I get box-mode thinking where if its not an audible voice or someone speaking directly to me then I may miss it. This is where our story for today begins.
STORY TIME
So last night, I was asked to come speak at one of the churches that was formerly at the prayer center. About what? I wasn't really sure. I got there last night with something in mind, all I was told was encourage that God pulls you through and about what you are doing. I can do that I have tons of stuff that God has pulled me through. Divorce, Parental Addiction, parental imprisonment, broken heart, suicide....the list goes on. Anyway, as I am sitting there waiting for my time to speak I am still unsure what I will talk about when I get up in front of these youth and their parents. Oh, this is my first time where I was asked to speak. So I get up there and I just kind of roll with it. I told them my name and that I was an intern at Onething then out of (I would say nowhere but I know that the Holy Spirit had been churning this stew of what to say in my heart for the past 4 days) my heart comes what has been going on most recently. I start telling these kids about the life I have lived through my Dad's mistakes and how God has always been what I've fallen on and how that has impacted my father's life this very day because of my steadfastness he has developed this unimaginable hunger for God and a peace and healing of his heart. Then I told about how God has taken me in the same way as my Dad into a place of being sanctified and hidden for him to learn how to be intimate with him because that was what truly lets you know God. to Know God is to love God and you can't do that from a distance so you have to let God get close and that's when he will bless you.
That's it. I ran out of words at that point but God was doing something in me that I wasn't fully aware of at the moment. That was my test. It was what was going to some other things in motion. Oh also at this time God was speaking to me that we needed to pray for healing in the room wasn't sure how to go about that so I said what I had to say and sat back down.
By the way, I am just going through the whole night so we get the full effect here.
So, God spoke to me that this was the month of harvest. Then the kid pastor, not exactly something I was thrilled about just dangerous stuff, spoke and when he was done some kids sang, then "The bishop" came up and spoke some announcements and some stuff, well about 30 minutes into his "closing remarks" he thanks me for coming then proceeds to just call out my mail so to speak. After this he asks if he can pray for me while he is praying for me he keeps telling me two names Lillian and Lydia.
----Sidebar----
I have been praying for my wife for probably about 6 months now.
----End Sidebar-----
So that's where my head goes and God confirms but the whole two name thing threw me off. He also asked to pray to break a curse that was over me from my father's family which I had always felt but never really knew how to recognize. So that happened and whether I fell out or not is immaterial, I felt pushed but whatever I know God did something.
So that happened then they start praying for salvation and healing for some other people which was such a relief. Because I was going to feel terrible if I left and didn't see that happen.
Ok so lets breakdown the two names for a moment. and be aware that I am about to get super open and personal right now. So feel special.
Lydia- she is mentioned in acts for only a couple of verses. The first part says,
'A woman named Lydia, from the city of Thyatira, a seller of purple fabrics, a worshiper of God, was listening; and the Lord opened her heart to respond to the things spoken by Paul. And when she and her household had been baptized, she urged us, saying, "If you have judged me to be faithful to the Lord, come into my house and stay." And she prevailed upon us.'the second just talks about Paul and Silas staying with her when they were released from prison.
Lillian- Well there is no mention of a Lillian in the bible so I went to the old English, Lillith...Lilith is, in Jewish folklore, a demon of the night and in Satanism is a demon who bestows Lustful dreams. Intense stuff.
So immediately, Lillian is ruled out at least as in Lilith but Lillian is a feminine name adapted from Lily as well so I think I was being told a few different things here.
First of all the Lydia part I believe is a representation of the character of my wife. The lilith part is the curse that was broken. That was a serious struggle I've had. Immediately after reading that it was identified in my spirit as being what was broken and healed.
So all this to say that God had been trying to tell me about "Lydia" for at least two weeks. I don't think that coincidence happens. I think there is order to the things that happen in our lives and I am so thankful that God doesn't give up in making sure I hear Him.
Two weeks ago, David Speicher was speaking in church about Paul and Silas in what just so happens to be the same passage but the parts between the Lydia parts (God knows that when I pay really good attention I tend to read the whole chapter because I like to understand context). The night before that I happened to have gone to see a band named Lydia and when I was there that name kept circling in my mind but I didn't think much of it I just figured it was me trying to remember if they sounded good, which they were ok but not my style.
END STORY TIME
So, be on the lookout for the mysterious ways God may choose to speak to you. His ways are way higher than ours so he probably is constantly trying to speak into you in some form or another and why is that because it is in his nature. He constantly wants to communicate with us since that is the foundation of relationships is communication. God reminded me of my constant memory verse this weekend through Ed when I was half conscious on saturday afternoon. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of ALL knowledge. I know nothing if I don't love and revere the Lord. Constantly learning, constantly listening, constantly watching for new and old ways that God will use me for, teach me, and show me his ways.
Amen.
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